Jon and Kate Got It All Wrong: Married With Children

Like us, we are sure many of you have been following the on-going saga surrounding the so-called “reality” show, Jon & Kate Plus Eight. Well, it seems like Jon and Kate are going to go their separate ways – divorce seems eminent. Ah, but apparently, the show must go on in spite of their impending divorce. Where to begin!

The sad truth is, Jon and Kate could have learned some valuable lessons if only they had reviewed our research findings! If they had, they might still be happily married and their eight children might have gotten to live and grow up in a loving, caring, and facilitative home environment. But alas, they didn’t.

So here is where our message comes in today – there are four major caveats we have learned over the years from all those successfully married couples we have interviewed that we think applies to the case of Jon & Kate Plus Eight – the Gosselin family.

Here they are in a nutshell:
1. The relationship between mom and dad trumps everything else in a marriage.
2. Successfully married couples do not air their family laundry (dirty or otherwise) in public.
3. Exploiting your family, particularly your children, for fame and fortune is never a good thing.
4. Privacy and alone time are one of the hallmarks of a successful marriage.

In the end, Jon and Kate would certainly have benefitted by knowing the “four caveats of successful marriage,” Maybe there is hope for their family. Maybe there is hope for their eight children.

To learn more about these read Married With Children: Jon and Kate Did It All Wrong

The Divorce Rate is NOT 50%

We just read yet another article that stated the divorce rate in the USA was 50%. The divorce rate is not nearly as high as it is often reported in the popular media. We need to change that perception because it can be a discouraging message to those contemplating marriage. Most experts we have talked to believe the rate is closer to 40%. We ourselves have estimated the rate for first time marriages to be at somewhere between 35% and 40%. In other words, when you take out all of the couples married multiple times, your chances of staying together the first time you get married are really 60-65%.

For more details read The Divorce Rate Myth Debunked

Gratitude is the Secret

"We would offer that gratitude is the secret of a successful loving relationship." from our new book due out in October, Simple Things Matter in Love and Marriage.

Summer of Love

The truth is, if we all had our Summer of Love there would be no violence, no heartbreak, no disaffection, no scorn or hate – there would be only love and peace. From our new book, Simple Things Matter in Love and Marriage

Thanks to Our Readers

We wanted to post a special thanks to all of our readers who came to the Book Expo America in New York City this weekend and stood in long lines to have us autograph our book for you. We feel totally overwhelmed by your support and the many touching stories you told us. Your loyalty to us has meant more than you will ever know. It is so gratifying that our book, Golden Anniversaries, has won so many awards. Look for our new book, Simple Things In Love and Marriage, in early Fall 2009.

Charley and Charley

Dr. Charles D. Schmitz
Dr. Elizabeth A. Schmitz
America's #1 Love and Marriage Experts

Relationship Between Husband and Wife

"The relationship between husband and wife trumps everything else in a marriage. Get it right and good things follow. Get it wrong and lots of bad things often happen!" To See More Love and Marriage Quotes

Marriage Advice - Fact or Fiction?

The Internet and television are very valuable resources for many of your unanswered questions about life, love, relationships, and marriage. There is much to learn that is available on the Internet and TV. But all that is out there is not the truth, it is not accurate, and it can be misleading. And it can be hurtful!

So, here is what we ask you to do – ask yourself these questions when you find advice on the Internet and on television about life, love, relationships, and marriage:

1. Do those who have written or spoken the advice have the proper academic credentials?

2. Do the advice givers have personal and credible evidence to support the notion that they are “experts” in their field of “advice?”

3. When you carefully read or listen to the advice being given, ask yourself this question – is the advice overly hyped?

4. Ask yourself this question – is their advice “beyond belief?”

5. Is the advice you are reading on the Internet from a source you can trust?

To find out more about what you can do to determine if the advice you hear is fact or fiction, just read the entire article, Marriage Advice - Fact or Fiction?